THE ABUSED

It felt like nothing made sense… ‘The true story of an abused teenager’

When I was eleven years old, my mum’s new boyfriend moved in with us. I thought it would be good for mum because she had a drinking problem and was depressed, and I thought it would make her feel better having him there. At first he was ok and bought me presents, but then mostly he ignored me. Then after a few months he started doing things that made me nervous, like when I was at home alone with him he’d walk around naked. Then he asked me to touch him – I tried to avoid him all the time, but sometimes I couldn’t and I was scared to tell him to stop.

I didn’t know how to tell mum what was happening because I didn’t even know what to say. One day when I was 13, we were fighting because I said I hated him (mum’s boyfriend) and she got angry with me. Then I told her how she doesn’t know what he does when she’s not around. At first she said I was making it up and exaggerating. Then she said I shouldn’t wear skimpy clothes around the house. It upset me deeply because it seemed like she didn’t really care about me and she didn’t blame him for what he did, it was like she thought it was my fault. I started staying over at friends’ places and avoiding going home. I told my friends I hated mum’s boyfriend but was too embarrassed to say I’d been abused by him. Sometimes mum told me I couldn’t go out, but often she was too stressed or pissed to notice what I was doing.

I couldn’t handle the way I was treated at home. Sometimes I’d sleep in empty buildings in the city, or couch hop at different people’s houses. I hung out with older guys and stayed with different guys for protection or for somewhere to sleep because I had almost no money. Sometimes I went back home but it was too hard being there and my mum’s boyfriend was openly rude to me. I tried to go to school but I drifted away from my friends and I got into using drugs, which made it harder to keep up with school. I was angry all the time and even the slightest thing would set me off yelling or walking away from people. It felt like nothing made sense, I hated myself and I didn’t know if mum really cared about me.

Why do people abuse?

Recently, I’ve been studying on causes of abuse in our society and made amazing discoveries. Most of the world’s greatest abusers today in our societies are people who have suffered some sort of abuse in the past or even lived in an abusive environment or home.

Research shows that abuse begets abuse and that in many cases the abused becomes the abuser. When people break free from an abusive person or thing there is a very high tendency that they would become the abuser, they switch roles. This is very common with those who often seek revenge and in most cases this abusive behavior goes beyond having vengeance on those who have hurt or abused them in the past, even when vengeance has been achieved most people find it difficult to live a normal life ever again. Scars are not healed by vengeance, rather, they change forms which is why the people in this category become possessed by this abusive nature and begin to abuse others often not been aware of their lack of control; they become robots unable to feel pity, mercy and love. Even when they love, they love abusively. In most cases, the people in this category abuse even themselves and happiness eludes them. Very many of them never end well.

Abused by my step dad

16 year old Jenni was abused by her step–dad. This is her heart–breaking real life story…

My mum is a nurse and my dad isn't around anymore. For ages it was just me, her and my two baby brothers. Then one day she brought a new man into our lives.

“At first it was great, almost like having a dad again...”

Jenni

We called him Uncle John, but I knew that he was really mum's new boyfriend. At first it was really great. Almost like having a dad again. John was always buying us presents and taking us out places. He let us move into his house and I couldn't remember seeing my mum so happy.

As a nurse, my mum sometimes had to work nights. When she wasn't around John would be in charge of putting us to bed. It was one of those nights that it happened for the first time.

Sometimes I caught John looking at me strangely, but it wasn't often and anyway I was just glad that our family was finally back on track. I was really pleased when John popped the question to mum, and she said yes.

Then one night I was getting changed for bed when I looked up and saw John was standing in the doorway. He said he had come to tuck me in, but I said that it was ok. I wasn't a baby and I could do it myself. He shut the door and came in anyway.

The first time he touched me I was really confused, I didn't really know that what he was doing was wrong. But I knew I didn't want him to do it again.

“I didn't know that what he was doing was wrong...”

Jenni

He told me that it was our secret and that mum didn't need to know about it. He had that weird look in his eyes and it frightened me, so I never said anything. I never said anything even when he started to come up to my room most nights, mum was so happy and I worried that I would spoil things for her.

I couldn't sleep and I wasn't comfortable in my own home. Memories of things that John would do and say were always coming into my head. I couldn’t concentrate at school and I didn't feel like telling my friends about it so they stopped talking to me.

Eventually I was so depressed that I started to cut myself. The pain of the cuts helped me forget about John.

Luckily a friend's big sister noticed the cuts on my arm one day at school. She took me off to give me a good talking to; telling me that cutting myself was just stupid.

“What John was doing was evil, and unfair...”

Jenni

As I was talking to her I broke down and told her everything. She was really shocked, but she handled it really well.

She told me that I had to tell my mum about John because what he was doing was evil and unfair.

I was terrified. I didn't think mum would want to hear. But I went home, waited until I was sure John wasn't in, and I told her everything.

She started to cry, and held me really tightly. I think she was in shock or something.

Then she went mental. John came home and she started shouting at him and throwing things. I hid upstairs.

He was shouting back at her and then I heard a crack and a scream, John had hit my mum.

“I heard a crack and a scream; John had hit my mum...”

Jenni

She came running upstairs and yelled at me and my brothers to pack. She had a cut over her eye and she was white as a ghost. We took what we could and then we legged it.

We had to stay in a hostel for a while. Mum made me tell the police all about what John had did. To be honest I don't know what's going to happen about it because we never talk about him now unless we have to.

Every human is a potential abuser

Abuse comes in several forms; mental, physical, emotional etc. my research shows that every human is born an instinctive abuser but of different percentage abuse levels with the highest form been mental abuse i.e. most humans are born natural mental abusers. This is seconded by physical abuse. Example, children learn to cry in other to get what they want, and then they begin learning how to attack, mostly when they realize that crying is no longer enough to get them what they want. Here, parents have a major role to play.

Abuse begets abuse

A single form of abuse is capable of abuse is capable of giving birth to several other forms, which is why people move from abusing the person who have abused or hurt them to others who know nothing of their story, or moving from financial abuse to health, freedom, physical or even being capable of taking a life. People can easily move from abusing guilty people to abusing innocent ones.

Individual battle in confronting the habit

The addictive habit of abuse is much more dangerous than any other form of addiction; this is due to the level of difficulty experienced in stopping it. Our research shows that why most people remain abusers till death is because of the fear of being abused in return or being abused a second time in life as the case may be for those that have been abused before they became the abusers. They don’t want to go through it again. People who abuse are very aware of the fact that their victims are waiting anxiously for the slightest of opportunities to get back at them so they don’t want to drop their guard even for a second, this is the kind of life abusers live, a life of total warfare. At this stage, total repentance is very difficult, there is no limit to their abusive habit, its war, war, and war. They live a life of total warfare. This explains why most corrupt politicians always want to remain in power or acquire more money in other to remain powerful; they steal more money and engage themselves in very dirty businesses. They continue to abuse the society and every other person till they die or are finally imprisoned.

Letting go

Further research showed that most people who forgive without forgetting often hurt more people than they would if they didn’t forgive at all. This so because they subconsciously abuse those who are close to them, people who would have stayed clear off them if they came out plain to announce there revenge mission. Yes, I said revenge mission because people in this category often find themselves at the end coming back to take revenge. They claim to have forgiven but never forgot, revenge, abuse and hurt are emotions and emotions like this one are very powerful and can posses anyone who harbors them in his/her mind feeding them with nutrition of remembrance. They get paranoid and skeptical about everything and everyone and would attack in the slightest whiff of suspicion. They end up destroying their marriages and friendships. A clear example of this is explained in the difficulty faced in attaining healthy level of trust in second and third marriages, especially if the both or one spouse has been previously divorced from an abusive marriage; he or she finds difficulty in trusting their new partner. This is precisely why most men would say that all women are the same and most ladies would say that all men are the same, because at some point of their lives themselves or their trust have been abused so they take it out on every body on the opposite sex.

No-one talked about it… But it did affect me growing up… ‘A teenager who lived in an abusive home’

I always used to think 'what's wrong with me and my family?' Every few weeks dad would get aggressive and weird, he said nasty and rude things about mum. Mum would just start crying - sometimes she would run out of the house and up the road to a neighbor’s, sometimes it took hours for us to find her. We used to all get really worried.

No-one talked about it - it was just one of those things. Dad never really hit mum, just threatened her, so maybe we didn't think it was that bad. But it did affect me growing up, and my other sisters too.

TOWARD FREEDOM

It is essential to know that abuse is an enemy you must fight; hate it all forms; hate it in others; and most especially, hate it in yourself. Now, if you must heal from an abused life or an abusive habit, you must learn to share. You must never hide the fact that someone has or is abusing you or that you have or are abusing someone. If you have abused someone in the past you may wonder why it is necessary to go back confronting it, perhaps you still feel remorse, or you are trying hard to forget. The worst of all prisons you can be is to become a prisoner of conscience. You need to talk to someone about an abused or an abusive life, someone you can trust, someone who can really understand and help the situation. If you keep to yourself an abused life someday you too will become an abuser and just like the person who abused you, you too will create another abuser.

One of the most tragic examples of this is seen in the case of rape. Research has shown that women who were raped especially brutally that never told anyone are never fully recovered. Very many of them become numb afterward and could even take the life of an opposite sex. Just like the popular saying goes “a problem half shared is a problem half solved”, you need to talk to people who can understand and help, if you are a religious person, talk to God about it, tighten your relationship with him and let him direct you. But most importantly, you must learn to forgive others and to forgive yourself; you must also learn to love, love others, love yourself and love God. True healing comes from forgiving, forgetting, and loving. I didn’t say it will be easy, Mahatma Gandhi once said, “the weak can never forgive, forgiveness is the attribute of the strong”. You must face up to it and be strong enough to forgive all things. Lewis B. Smedes said, “to forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you”. If you have abused others in the past and now you seek change, change and healing are always around the corner but you must understand that you cant undo anything you’ve already done, but you can face up to it, you can tell the truth, you can seek forgiveness, and let God do the rest. Said Sara Paddison “sincere forgiveness isn’t colored with expectations that the other person apologize or change. Don’t worry whether or not they really understand you, love them and release them, life feeds back truth to people in its own way and time”. You have the right not to be abused as much as you don’t have the right to abuse anybody. My mentor –Patricia Omoqui thought doctor, life coach and author of clarify your purpose and live it, once said, “love is what is – all that is, the very essence of all that exists. It is the pure energy beneath all the fear and self-doubt in the world. It is all encompassing kindness of the universe expressed in every form imaginable”.

Embrace peace today; stay free, stay happy, and stay loved. Let’s make the world a better place.

THE ABUSED by Ike Zion Quotes

MindLink international

Speaker, life coach, thought doctor and author.

WHAT DOES PURPOSE SERVE

We can not count all the organizations that operate under specific purposes and of course that these purposes serve. But then, before you think of man producing a car to serve his purpose, you sure should think of the car without man, think of a cobweb without the spider, think of money without the spender, think of a perfectly made suit that can never be worn, think of a nest without the bird, think of the without the creatures, and then you think of purpose without existence and reason.

There is no purpose without existence and reason, there is no existence and reason without creation, and there is no creation without a creator.

Really, I know exactly what science has said about creation and life on earth. I know all the theories like a poem; the theory of “spontaneous generation”; the theory of “panspamia”; the theory of “chemical evolution” which was developed during the 1920’s by Russian biochemist “Alexander T. Oparin” and British biologist “J.B.S Haldane”. I even know about the “Primeval soup” and how it has analyzed and explained the chemical evolution; and yes, I know of its inconsistencies and unending speculations, I have been through that already; done that; lived through the miserable life and wondering if God truly existed, but there was not a way there, nothing you can find; oh yes! What exactly can be proved? Reality is only a state of mind. But a famous proverb had once said “live as if there is a God; if there is God, you gain eternity; if there is no God, you lose nothing”.

Purpose at its origin was made first and foremost to serve God, but purpose in its form is infinite and man has a free-will; however, the will of God is done regardless.

Man, in his form, was brought into existence without his consent, and until he discovers a purpose and assumes a God to whom his purpose will server, he will live through, just existing without reason. Life would be meaningless if there was no God. Life on earth, the earth itself, and the whole universe is too complex and organized to be a product of one alleged spontaneous action or even a set of chemical reactions. But purpose can be compromised and misunderstood; the ability of invention that man posses was born out of the fact that he was made in the very image of his maker an bearing such characteristics is proof that he was made god here on earth to govern the affairs of his maker; he is an ambassador.

This however, explains the reason why true happiness has never and can never be achieved through his very inventions because true happiness does not bear its source from anything that is made, seen, or touched by the flesh. Anything that does not represent Gods interest does not bear eternal peace, happiness, and joy; it can only give more knowledge and more confusion, more money and more restlessness, more marriage and more divorce; more houses and less homes; more emotions and more pains; more questions and less answers; more securities and more crimes; more weapons and more wars; more civilization and less humanity. It can only live us wondering why the world is like this.

Life is short and death is coming, the only thing you owe yourself living in it is to seek true happiness.

WHO IS GOD – WHAT IS MAN

It is amazing to know that man in his thirst, explanation, and adventure for the unknown has defined God and himself unknowingly to him in many ways and many tongues; true, but has not been able to comprehend his very own explanations. But how can man define God if he can not define himself, how can he explain the nature of God if he can not explain his very own nature. So I guess the question we should be asking is “who and what is man?” however, you can not truly understand man if you do not understand God because mans existence lies in the existence of God and his understanding about who and what he is lies in his ability to assume a God, what ever it be; as man can not find true meaning in life if he does not assume a God.

Saying this, I strongly believe that the most logical reason why man has not been able to find answers about his true nature and origin is because he has not defined the God that he follows and why most of those who have come close to this have not been able to explain the meaning that drives this very nature and origin that binds them to their maker. And why religious groups have not helped in this matter, they place doctrine before them and their maker; others have formulated theories that forbid worshipers from enquiring basic and foundational things about their maker (the God that they follow and worship), yet, the thirst remains unquenchable in our hearts; “who is God, when did he start to exist, how did he come to be?” these and more are what the atheistic person would very much be interested in, these lines of questions. But you already know that if you should follow, it’s with reason and of course with the knowledge of what and who you follow, where it comes and where it goes, that way you can define your purpose and without doubt; that way you can find meaning for your finite and infinite living. It is a huge relief to know who god truly is, what he’s made of and why he’s so connected to us and the whole universe. It’s true, we are made in the image of God, and for us to truly understand ourselves and purpose, we must first understand God; hold him; embrace him; and commune with him.

This chapter is not about religion, doctrine, science, or any practice of such been concord by human principles, knowledge and contextual understanding from traditional and cultural influences. This chapter is about the finite and infinite life; it is about all existence, peace and fulfillment.

The universe carries limitless bodies, over billions of planets; those existing outside the solar system or even not close; some several million light-years away. It is amazing to know that apart from the earth, some of these complex bodies have in them the ability to keep, maintain, and manage life or every form of life capable of surviving within its environment. Remember that this chapter’s main objective is not to contradict the several other theories that has already been put by religion, doctrine, and even sciences; but to bring our minds to reason. The only reason our nine planets could move perfectly around their solar orbit without falling apart or crashing into each other is because of the laws that govern their existence. Everything has a system, and everything is a system. In this account I would say that science has played a very important role in bringing us closer to God. Science is not an enemy of God, it is a system, another gift from God to humans and every other creature that exhibit such wonderful trait as to invent and discover. Atheism is not a product of science, it is a product of the mind, and with thanks to atheism, it has driven us closer to God and with the burning desire to know him better and made us day after day even more theistic and loyal to the course of our maker.

The article “Why God Did Not Create the Universe” by STEPHEN HAWKING and MLODINOW yet argue about this fact; “there is a scientific explanation for the making of our world – no gods required”, yet bringing us to the fact that the universe is a system operating under principles. In this article was also mentioned the words of Albert Einstein yet argumentatively misplacing what it means; “the most incomprehensible thing about our universe is that it is comprehensible”. Another atheist “Richard Dawkins” writes that to explain the machinery of life “by invoking a supernatural designer is to explain precisely nothing”. Why? Because it leaves unexplained the origin of the designer; “who designed the designer?” this however is a point defending him as an atheist, yet pointing out to the fact that the universe can not be a closed system without an external influence as you will see in the following paragraph.

Scientific Evidence of God
by Bob Dutko

While Intelligent Design skeptics may claim there is no evidence of God, the actual scientific evidence for God's existence is overwhelming, scientifically answering the question, "does God exist?”

In science there is a Law of Physics called the 1st Law of Thermodynamics. Within it is a Conservation of Energy Law that states, as a key principle that all energy in a closed system must be conserved. Okay, fancy language, but what does that mean? It means that while energy can convert into matter (physical “stuff”), and matter into energy, however much total “stuff” there is (matter and energy), there can never be an increase in that total amount or a decrease in that total amount. So however much total “stuff” there is in the universe, (matter and energy combined), there can never have been more and never have been less. All it can do is convert to different forms, like matter to energy or energy to matter, but the total amount of all of it has to remain the same.

The “closed system” is a scientific term that refers to a system or an “area” that has no outside influence, like the universe. Now, as believers we know, of course, that God does influence the universe, so many believers would consider the universe an “open system”, (one that does get outside influence), but for the atheist who says there is no God, the universe is all there is, so from their perspective and for the sake of conventional science, the universe would get no outside influence and would therefore be considered a “closed system”.

Back to the 1st Law of Thermodynamics. If it states that you can never have an increase or decrease of energy/matter, which means that matter/energy can not be created from nothingness, how did we get all the matter and energy in the universe? If science is all there is and there is no God, then the 1st Law of Thermodynamics reigns supreme and therefore it would be impossible to have matter and energy in existence right now. Simply put, when you open your eyes and see matter and experience energy, what you see is impossible according to the known Laws of science if, in fact, there is no God. Therefore, science itself says there must be a God.

Plain and simple, matter/energy can not come into existence. It is scientifically impossible, yet here we see everything around us, so how can that be? There are really only 3 possibilities. Option A: Everything came into existence by itself anyway, without the help of God, (even though science has proven that impossible). Option B: Everything in the universe has always existed for all of eternity, (which, by the way is also scientifically impossible. Or Option C: There must be a God, a being greater than science, who created the Laws of science and has the ability to disobey them. Not only is a belief in God the only logical conclusion to draw, it's the only one scientifically possible because remember, if there is no God, the first two options are scientifically impossible according to the actual Laws of Physics.

Believe it or not, a 5 year old child could be an atheistic scientist's worst nightmare by merely asking him “where did everything come from if God didn't make it?” What that child is actually asking in scientific terms is “how do we have a violation of the 1st Law of Thermodynamics by the creation of energy and matter in the closed system of the universe if there is no Creator capable of doing that?”

This article is a firm truth to say that while the atheistic scientists are struggling to prove there is no God, indeed they are undoubtedly saying that God does exist; and while those are making much effort to prove the existence of God, we struggle with the pact that man is yet to understand the true nature of God which is why the motion still remains subject to debate.

For the benefit of all humanity, understanding god’s true nature is the only true solution we can find in this deteriorating age of humanity.

It’s relieving to say that man was created in the image of God according to biblical analysis which by-the-way certain atheistic persons have vividly argued and criticized, tagging it a baseless story with poor inconsistency and background knowledge. True, it takes faith to believe and understand something beyond physical and canal comprehension, especially one without a physical proof or that you were not born in the time of its occurrence, but remember that the actual laws of biology states that every living thing comes from an already existing one. Humans, we are a living system and could never have existed without a pre-existing system (God).

The whole universe is a system, everything it holds is a system, and God is the finite and infinite supernatural force (system) that explains everything that can not be explained, and as systems been subject to a greater system we can not function beyond our capacity and nature programming; these rules are in place for good reasons.

Anything can be a God (system) to you, but there certainly is only one God above others; one system who governs all other systems, and he certainly is not something that can be explained in the term of figure because even man himself truly does not exist in figure.

God is a system that creates, designs, and governs all other systems. The closest lead to this explanation is an atom, and like an atom he can be so small to exist in our hearts and yet so big that the whole universe could exist in him. Like an atom, God is a system that can not be created nor destroyed by any theories we can propound because we are systems functioning in line to our design. So I think the big question is not “understanding how this system comes to be” but how it functions and why it does exist, for if we look deep into ourselves we could see even the reflection of God and in understanding this, one can truly understand Gods true essence and existence thus interpreting its origin in the language that he, and he alone can understand.

Remember: to say that we are made in the image of God is to say that we are systems functioning in replicate to the master system.

can i forgive and still love again?

If you don’t mind, I’d like you to carry out an assignment.           Go to five successful, aged married couples and ask what there secrete is, or was. You might wanna right down things. Back in your closet, analyze them all, carefully, over and over again. You will see that these people had even greater problems. But what makes the difference? Simple, “where people saw pain, disappointment, and betrayal, they saw opportunity”.            Love is a moving car, it breaks down, there has been, and will only be one mechanic, “FORGIVENESS”. Now, do you say because your car broke down somewhere along the road, you will abandon it? No, it cost you so much to afford it. So is love. I hear them say “love don’t cost a thing”. Wake up! People don’t wanna hear the truth; they want what makes them feel better. Are you man enough to face true facts and reality, or do you prefer to live in false illusions and fantasies, believing only what makes you feel better? Think! It cost you so much to be in love, the splendid times, moments when you are wrapped around yourselves, and you witness the union of minds, and bodies touching bodies, soft tender kisses and looks that drives hot liquid fire burning through your veins, and you cant think of anything else. You smile stupidly at your phone when she rings. Think about it, all the sacrifices, all the things you gave away, just for love. Something that cost you so much to afford, will you just abandon it because it has faulty engine?           Anger is instinctive, anger is inevitable. But you must learn how to control it, absorb it, change it, and use it. Unforgiveness is a handles sword; it will always leave a mark on the bearer.           You can be happy with her; the past has got absolutely nothing to do with the future, if we don’t carry it in today’s train. For me, I see an opportunity, a moment of love lost, and love found, realization and forgiveness, commitment and trust earned. A moment when you can fully understand yourselves and become those who walk across hell untouched by fear and doubt. A moment to rebuild, create legacy, and become an example to thousands of youths in the nearest future. Let’s make the world a better place, it is possible to forgive and still love again.               What you see above is the part that keeps us together, but at the same time, love is not selfish. While you are doing the entire forgiving and winning back thing, make sure it’s what she really wants, make sure she still loves and wanna be with you, make sure she’s worth the price, the pain, the fight, make sure you can have a life together. I have learnt a very long time ago, never to hold anything too tight or too strongly, you’ll break them, or they’ll give you a scar when they finally leave.           Take her outing, to a park of someplace she loves to be. Make it romantic, very romantic. Explain to her, how much you love her, how much she means to you, etc. let her know you are not perfect, but can always adjust to make her happy. Then ask her, if she really wanna be with you, if she feels the same way. Avoid getting into an argument. If she doesn’t want you, you have to let her go. Its better, it will hurt even more, if you try to force her into loving you. No body can force love.           Finally, there’s one thing you must know. “The only security the world has got to offer is when you know that you are capable of dealing with what so ever comes your way”.           I wish you luck!!!

Life is a gift

A clever man sees the world as the survival of the fittest, but a wise man knows there are no fittest who are mortals.

I have learnt a very long time ago not to hold anything too tightly, you will either break them or they will leave you with a scar when they finally escape your grip. Anything that you lost was never yours, if it’s yours, it will come back to you, but first, you have to move on. The best way to gain all that you have lost is by moving on and ahead. If you grieve so much for the past, you will never see new opportunities, new joy, new life, new course; you will live on the schedules of yesterday. Know this, we can’t protect anything in this world, not even our lives, neither can we save people or anything that is of this world. The best we can do is to make good use of what ever is given to us for the time that it has been given to us. Nothing is a do or die affair, because even we, were brought and born into this world without our consent, meaning that the world is not our property.

Life is a gift and every single person was created with a single purpose. For the fact that you are still alive means that the one who brought you without your consent is keeping you, still, for a purpose. Understand that you don’t have the power to keep or save anything. God is the only one who can take, and he is the only one who can keep. I say this from personal experience. When I look back in retrospect, about my life, I realize how powerless we are in ensuring security in anything that exists in this world. Every thing happens according to the will of the one who has brought you and me even without our consent. We must serve our purpose and let go of anything that has gone. I will now tell you a bit of my story and why I stopped bothering over earthly security.

1997, in a village farm, I was attacked by a huge, dangerous snake. That I survived that attack wasn’t by my making. That might look very funny to you but look at this next one.

1999, in the city of Abuja, I was stricken by osteoporosis leading to a major fracture on my leg which kept me on a hospital bed for over a year without setting foot on ground. Sadly, less than two months after I was discharged I lost the one person I thought I could never live my life without, the one person that has stayed and cried besides me for over a year while I moved from death to life on a hospital bed, the one person that spoke hope into my ears. I lost my mom. I felt the world busting over my head, crumbling over my shoulders, and breaking under my feet. Hope was dying and as if that wasn’t enough my dad lost his job, and so, life went from bad to worst in a family of six (6). How did I survive? It wasn’t by my making.

Ones, I escaped a hazardous petrol fire. It wasn’t by my making.

2011, I survived two terrible automobile crash, came out alive and unharmed. How did I survive? It wasn’t by my making.

So tell me, was my life a matter of luck? No, it wasn’t luck, the purpose that I serve demanded this procedures and that my life should remain and be untouched. Don’t get it twisted, I am not immortal, one day I will leave, maybe in my old days or even sooner. But right now, what I must do is to serve my purpose; also, you must discover your purpose and serve it. Now I can tell you to move on because even I have moved on.

It is purpose that defines us, keeps us, binds us, separates us, and molds us. It is purpose that makes the world go round. The world is purpose.

So then, if you are out there bothering over money, property, loved ones, or even life. I highly recommend that you embrace freedom and concentrate on the purpose for your existence. Leave every other thing for the one who has the power to take and give, leave it all for the one who has brought even you into existence without your consent. Leave it to God. Believe it or not, it is God who creates purpose, substance, life and even death. And if you really do not believe in God, here is a saying “live as if there is God, if there is God, then you will gain eternity, if there is no God, then, you lose nothing”.

Do not forget that your decisions in life are very vital to the success of your purpose and that of the world at large. God made you in his own image not because it was fun creating you, but because he wants you to govern his affairs here on earth; he wants you to be an ambassador, doing his will and only his will.

I’d like to share with you what triggered this write-up. 30minuits ago, before I started on this article, I lost something very valuable to me. I mistakenly deleted a folder containing a number of pages for a book I am working on, I didn’t have a backup. But I have moved on because I know that the same mind that wrote them can do more and even better, though, the mistake of not having a backup have been thoroughly noted. But the lost pages cannot and would never stop me from completing the book; neither will it stop the book from being what it was meant to be.

Finally, I would say this again, “I have learnt a very long time ago never to hold anything too tightly, you will either break them of they would leave you with a scar when they finally escape your grip”.

I hope this article affect your life in positive ways. Amen.

reflection of the real you

           “The only real failure in life is the failure to try” (anonymous)

            It’s time to look into the mirror and see the reflection of the real you. See beyond your skin color, gender, height, and facial construction.

            Every great vision in life starts with a vision, a vision that grows into reality. It’s all a state of mind; it all begins from the mind.

            It’s time to break loose, stop being what society says you are and start being what you want to be, who you were born to be, your purpose for existence. Nothing can stop you, only you. You have to chose, remain a sheep, or break loose from the crowd and become a lion.

            It’s time to have a change of mentality, time to let go of public opinion, a time of self realization. You are wonderfully made, take the mask off your face and prove your worth. Don’t be afraid to move, don’t be afraid to flap your wings, even if you fail, don’t be afraid to try again. Try, until you can soar high across the sky. You are an eagle, not a chicken.

“If you don’t know where you are going in this life, people will lead you to where they are going”. (A.C Gab)

I heard of a story talking about a farmer who went to the woods and picked up an eagles egg, he came home to his poultry and kept the egg to be hatched among other eggs of his chickens. The young eagle lived and grew with all the other chickens and always he would come around and check on it. He noticed apparently the difference between this young eagle and all the other chickens, the way they grew, ate, played, and did everything; the eagle was much more powerful.

            One day, while he was there, he heard a loud noise from above, in the sky, it was the mother eagle, and she had spotted her young one.

And the mother eagle began to fly round and round crying out to her son and he heard the voice, looked up above the sky and saw where he belonged, ought to be, and so he began to scream, he was restless and began to run round too. He began to flap his wings and all the chickens ran to hide themselves, they were so frightened that none dared to come out. As the mother eagle continued to go round, calling out, her young son grew angry and impatient; he began flapping his wings even harder, and all of a sudden, he found himself above ground level. All of a sudden, strength, great strength came to his wings, he tried for the first time and failed, he tried again, and again, and again, and again, and all of a sudden, he went to the sky and never came back again.

NOTE: “The power of the oppressor is in the ignorance of the oppressed”. (A.P Gbenga Igbafen)